I’ve been on a bit of a writing hiatus lately hence the lack of posts on here. I got married last month and wedding planning and admin took over a bit, alongside day job and other life stuff, meaning something had to give. I take my hat off to writers I read about in interviews who describe their chaotic lives and how they will grab every spare moment to still get words down on paper. Words were still there in my head, with scenes from a new book playing out often, but I just didn’t have the energy or headspace to really get stuck in. I’m excited to give some new focus to my creative life again, with my first goal to finish edits on a book I finished a while back (and put to one side after some feedback). This will hopefully be out by the end of this year, or the start of next, depending how fast I work.

I had a wonderful day on my wedding and naturally when big life events like this take place I think it makes you reflect on life in general. The playlist we chose for our wedding reception contained key songs from pinnacle moments of our youth and when surrounded by friends from different walks of life it made me feel lucky, and also happy and content with a real sense of ‘being in the right place at the right time.’

During our mini-moon to Arran I ventured out on a walk myself along the beach (as my new hubbie rested up to recover from a cold!). I stopped off at an amazing bakery to buy a sausage roll and as I sat on a bench watching the waves lap against the shore it reminded me of all of trips I went on during my 30s. I embraced the single life for most of my 30s and feel grateful for the adventures I went on to Paris alone, twice, where I sat eating a pastry on a bench in Jardin De Luxembourg feeling then too, I was in the right place, at the right time. When I met my husband in my late 30s I was truly happy with who I was, and what I had accomplished. Too often I feel we are made to feel pressured by some arbitrary timeline of expectation and I am so glad real love arrived a bit later in life for me. My husband joked when we first got together he had been in ‘the boyfriend oven’ getting ready for me and I loved this description as I think I was also in my own oven getting ready for him too.

When my first book came out I was delighted I had achieved this massive life goal of mine at the age of 35. Then this year I read one of the best books I’ve ever read ‘Lessons in Chemistry’ and the author Bonnie Garmus is in her 60s, and this is her debut and part of me thought maybe to write a truly amazing and insightful novel you actually need to wait a while to let life happen so you know how to write about it well. In recent years I definitely view my writing ‘career’ as a continuous work in progress and I’m not even sure what I want my goals to look like anymore – really just keeping words on a page, reaching readers somewhere feels like an achievement these days.

In my job as a careers adviser I come across a lot of young people putting immense pressure on themselves, often those in their 20s particularly hard on themselves, feeling like life is passing them by because they’re not where they thought they would be, or they’re not where they think they should be (or more often than not, after some unpicking, really they are worrying about other people judging them to not be where they think they should be).

I think we should all scrap the ‘timeline’ from our head and not get hung up on achieving our goals. I do think it can be energising and kind of exciting to have goals, but we shouldn’t be a slave to them, and we should leave room to let them change too because no one really wants to follow a linear path – often the detours make for a much more scenic adventure.